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    The Rosh HaShanah shopping list

    Dear God,

    I am not sure that I believe in You but I have decided to give You the benefit of the doubt. (I know You feel like saying, “Big deal!” but please do it away from my hearing.)

    So, on the basis that You do actually exist and are all that they say You are, this is my spiritual shopping list for the year ahead.

    Life for another twelve months – there may be another life after this one, and it may even be rather heavenly, but all things considered I prefer to stay around on earth for the time being.

    Life for my wife/husband and family too – we want to enjoy each other for a bit longer. We also want to see what happens with our children and grandchildren and to know that our hopes for them have more or less come true.

    Money to live in comfort – I know the world economy is still not certain of itself, and I am financially down compared to a few years ago, but I couldn’t go back to those years when I didn’t know how I was going to pay the butcher’s bill.

    It would help if You could do something to make the government more sensible and sound-thinking and stop the United Nations from giving Israel a bad time so often.

    Talking of Israel, I’d like to see things settle down there – and please knock some sense into those rabbis’ heads.

    What’s that that You’re saying – “How about you doing something yourself to help the community?”… all right, maybe You’ve got a point.

    But don’t start giving me advice about praying a bit more often – I have made an exception for You today and that’s probably enough till next year.

    Do we understand each other? I guess so – and God, do have a good year and look after Yourself.

    See here for God’s reply.

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