Snippets of Purim humour
• A patient told her doctor she had been ill since Purim. “Purim? What’s that?” The woman told him about Mordechai and Esther. The doctor said, “How can I cure a disease that has been going on so long?”
• At the Purim banquet Berel gave Schmerel a very small portion of chicken. “If I were the host,” said Schmerel, “I would take the smaller portion for myself.” “Well, you have the small portion already – so what’s your problem?” said Berel.
• A guest at a Purim meal saw a large plate of kreplach on the table. He took one and said, “This is in honour of the One God of heaven and earth!” He took a second one and said, “This is in honour of the two tablets of the Commandments!” The third reminded him of the patriarchs, the fourth of the matriarchs. The hostess whispered to her husband, “Quick, take away the plate before he gets to the 600,000 Israelites who left Egypt!”
• A man bought a watch which didn’t work. The shopkeeper shook it and it started going again. Several times this happened until the customer got fed up. He said to the shopkeeper, “I think you’ve made a mistake. I asked for a watch, not a lulav!”
